Hell, Yeah! Hevens, No! Purgatory, Maybe?
by jamestandspock
Summary: After killing Dick, Dean's soul broke apart one piece went to Heaven, one to Hell, the last one is in Purgatory. What will happen when the shreds come back together, as demon, angel and human each? Will they become one, or will they fight each other as Sam tries to make sense of what's left of his brother? Demon! Angel! Human! multiple personalities!
1. Chapter 1

**Gee starting a new fic before even really starting the other, well, i am not really known to finish stuff soo… well bear with me. Or don´t I don´t really care. I do care about getting this started tho :D new ideas ahh… gotta love ´em, right?**

**K…. mm Dean´s PoV don´t know if it´ll change with the plot, but for now we are Dean-o´s shadow, or so to speak.**

HINSÍTHGRYRE

I don´t remember how, the last thing I really remember is Cas holding Dick as I stabbed him, then this excruciating pain, like I was being torn apart cell by cell, there was this darkness and when Dick exploded, that was when it happened.

I woke up, I was tied, well chained to a wall, the room was small, damp and dark, the air reeked of sulfur. I recognized the place, I was back in hell, back in the pit.

It was a long while until I heard steps coming toward the door that allowed access to my holding cell, through the door I was not surprised at the demon that greeted me.

"Hello Dean" the distinctive accent of the Brit filled the room. "Hope you are comfy here."

"To what deed do I owe a visit of the king in his own realm?" I grinned at the demon, which oddly enough laughed.

"Dean, Dean, you are here because I like you, and you are special." Crowley answered. "Do you know how hard was even for me to sneak you here? Most of the demons out there want your head on a spear. If they found you not even I could do a thing to save your sorry piece of soul."

I just scoffed, sure as hell Crowley didn´t wanted to keep me alive out of the kindness of his heart.

"So I have a proposition for you." I rolled my eyes, not like I would make a deal, I was already in hell. "It is not a deal, it is an honest proposition, look you want to live, I know that, you want to get out of here, to get back to your brother and your angel, right?" I didn´t answer, I just glared at him. "Right, so the thing is Castiel can´t take you out, and I can´t either, well, not as a human." He said rising his eyebrows at me, inviting me to consider; the only way to get out was becoming a demon, that was what Crowley was implying, to get out I would have to lose my humanity, to become the same thing I hunted. "Look it´s not that hard, want to get out or not?"

"Is there no other way?" I asked, not that the demon would answer truthfully if he had intent on making me one of his.

"Well there is another way out." The demon started. "thing is you´ve got to cross all hell and pass into purgatory and then find the portal and hike your way back."

"But?"

"But there is no way you can get to the gate alive. All the demons in hell and all the creatures in purgatory want you dead, demons are way more powerful down here and so are monsters in purgatory, besides down here and there in monsterland there are things you have never seen before, things that even leviathans are afraid of, add that you are alone, and weaponless; survival probabilities: nil."

"Why would you want to help me?" I sneered at him.

"Well I do need a second in command, you killed my last, and I hate your angel, think how he´ll react when he sees you out of here and made a demon. Hm? The reason he first took you out from here was to prevent that, last time you were oh-so-close but angel boy came in just in time and took you out."

"So this is to be able to get payback on Cas?" Damn, I didn´t want to hurt Cas, but Crowley´s offer was the only apparent way out.

Crowley grinned.

"If I say yes, then what? I become your bitch?" I asked rolling my eyes.

"No, not really, I mean you´ll get to boss the other demons around only I can give you orders but I won´t ask you to do anything other than your job, the only difference is I´ll give you certain targets to take out, you can keep hunting, go back to your brother and your angel and just come in when I call for you." He explained pacing around the room.

He gave me time to think about it for a while, and I did, I thought a lot about it, I was known for doing the impossible, but trekking out of hell to purgatory with a minimal, basically non-existent, chance of actually getting out of hell in the first place, I couldn´t take that chance. Michael was locked down here too, no angel was coming for me this time, and Sam needed help, Sammy, my baby brother was left alone with a prophet, a really scared and almost useless prophet. If the only safe way out of this was by becoming a demon, I would do it, for him, for Sammy.

When Crowley came into the room again, I had made my decision.

"So, what´s it going to be?" he asked.

"I´ll do it, but there is one condition, I will become a demon, I will be your right-hand-man, I will never betray you, but you cannot ask from me to betray in any way any of those I consider family, and whatever happens they always come first for me."

"Very well." Crowley snapped his fingers and I became free of my bonds.

"So, how do we do this?" at that the king smiled and took out a knife, he snapped his fingers again and the room changed, it became the room in which I had been last time that I was in hell, it was the room Alistair took me to when I started to torture souls, actually there was one attached to the table in the center of the room, the walls were decorated by any and all possible torture instruments.

I turned to Crowley he had cut his wrist open as I inspected the room, recognizing it, he gave me a metal cup filled with the dark-red liquid.

"Here, drink this first." He said looking at me pointedly. I hesitated for a second, then I thought of Sam, I was doing this for him. I drowned the liquid, then I understood how Sam had got addicted to this stuff, it was the most delicious thing I had ever tasted, as I finished the cup all my previous memories of hell came to the forth of my mind, specifically the ones of the last ten years, everything I had learned from Alistair and how I enjoyed using the knowledge he gave me and getting creative.

I had learned from the best, I had become a master torturer under Alistair´s teachings, I never tortured anyone in front of my brother as I had tortured the souls down here, I was sure that if Sammy knew what I could do he would have hated me, he would have called me a monster, and he probably will the next time I see him, just that next time I will be a monster, damn I don´t even know if he´ll let me explain before he kills me, but I gotta try, for him and… for Cas.

"You know how things work down here Dean, you´ll have to earn your place, and I believe I don´t have to explain you how that needs to be done." The demon said as he walked towards the door.

I knew exactly what he was talking about, I had to make myself a rep, I had to make other demons afraid of me, and there was only one way to do that, I was sure that most of the inferior demons where already terrified of me, but there were a lot of bigger fish out there, and right now I wasn´t even a demon, I had a long way to go before taking my place at Crowley´s right.

AZRAFIEL

I woke up in a room of complete and even I would say annoying whiteness.

"Cas?" I whispered hoping the angel was not far away. "Sammy?" I called after the second hadn´t answer.

"They are not here." A soft female voice said.

"Where are they?" I asked turning to the voice a small woman was standing before me she was dressed smartly and her posture screamed 'angel'.

"Sam´s on Earth, but we are still trying to find Castiel´s whereabouts" she answered.

"I must get back to them" I said looking around for a way out, I found none.

"We can´t let you do that Dean" she said swiftly.

"What do you mean you can´t let me do that?" I was getting annoyed, friggin angels!

"We have plans for you Dean, heaven has plans for you." Geesh this woman! "and until those plans are fulfilled you cannot be allowed to leave."

"And what are this plans exactly, huh? Last time heaven had plans for me they wanted me to become Michael´s puppet." I challenged.

"You locked him up, you might as well say you killed him, so now you´ll pay for it, Camael will come soon to get things started don´t get to comfortable you´ll miss this room soon enough." And I could tell she was pissed, like really royally pissed.

Camael was a huge guy, the scary kind of guy, with a snap of his fingers we were in another room this one looked like a lot like the one I was kept on down in hell, the time I sold my soul, the difference was this was way cleaner, a lot whiter. Another snap of the angel´s and I was strapped to a torment table, so this was it, it was how I would pay in eyes of the angels.

I wasn´t able to talk I only saw Camael coming near me with a huge syringe in his hand it was filled with a white glowing fluid, I had come to know as grace, and rudely and without warning he stabbed me in the heart with it emptying the contents into my system. It felt warm and heavy, it cursed through my veins like poison contaminating every cell in my body making all my nerves scream in pain at the same moment, it lasted for a long while, not sure how long, I had passed out after ten solid minutes of it.

Each time I was able to regain consciousness, I´d only see the huge angel smirk before being injected with the white glowing stuff that burned me from the inside, the damned thing hurt like a bitch, but after a few minutes I would pass out again.

HUNTER

This was my second week in purgatory, Cas had disappeared the second we had arrived here, I met Benny a few days back, he´s a vampire, he´s helping me survive. Now, I in comparison I must say I miss Hell this place is so damned unpredictable, downstairs you know what´s gonna happen to you, you know you are going to get tortured and then reanimated, here any second could be your last, at any moment you can end as monster chow, I can´t even trust Benny after he saved my sorry ass, I haven´t slept since I got here, but I seem to manage just fine, the problem is I don´t know how long I´ll last. The only thing that´s keeping me alert and fighting is that I need to find Cas, after that, the plan is to find a way home, but with my damned luck possibilities are narrow.


	2. Chapter 2

HINSITHGRYRE

Time went by down here, it had been at least two months, Crowley came to see me every single day, he´d bring demon blood for me to drink, it was no longer his but it tasted exquisite nonetheless. He usually stayed for a few minutes while I worked in the soul currently strapped to my rack, he said he appreciated the art, this used to bother me the first few weeks, but then I realized that maybe if I too came to appreciate my work, maybe then it would hurt less to keep going, and my transformation would go smoother.

So I decided to let myself enjoy my job again, to rejoice in the screams and feel encouraged by their pleads and their begs for me to stop. And it actually worked, my soul and body started changing albeit slightly, but noticeable. Demons´ real faces are rather disgusting, they don't look different from the souls I crave in, they are mauled, and if zombies are ugly demons are a thousand times worse, only the new souls looked completely human, after my first time in hell my soul was far from intact it had several scars here and there but I still looked somewhat similar as when I was alive, the difference from two months ago to the day, was that my canines had become sharper and a bit longer and the corners in the white of my eyes started to become black, my irises though had become more vibrant, their green color had intensified.

"Please don´t do this!" the woman strapped to the rack sobbed. "This is a mistake, please!"

"Is it?" I laughed as looked to the table where my favourite knives were settled. "So you never made a deal, eh?" part of my job consisted in being able to know all the sins of the soul I´m gonna work on.

"No, please, please." She was crying now and I hadn´t touched her yet, geez I hate those, the easy ones. The more resistance a soul gave the more entertaining the job was. "I-I didn´t…"

"Ha, you didn´t what?" I shut her as I picked a wicked looking knife, its blade was curved and it had sharp dents. "You didn´t know you were summoning a demon, or you didn´t know how you sent it to kill your boss?" I walked to her, the thrill in my veins, I took the knife close to her and she whimpered. "Or perhaps you didn´t know what was going to happen when the time was up?" she looked at me through teary eyes, she jumped when I rested the knife on her skin, and as I was about to make the first cut I heard a familiar knock on the door. I growled, damned Crowley, well actually it was better for him to arrive when I was about to start and not in the middle of it, when it was harder to stop.

I put the knife down on the table and walked to open the door. The short demon came through.

"Hello, darling. How are we doing today?" he said taking a look around the room, his eyes resting in the soul I had yet to start on.

"I was just beginning." My relationship with the demon had gotten better, but well, he was the only one I could speak to.

"Hm an easy one, eh?" he looked at the pitiful woman.

"You don´t say. Man I hate those!" the king laughed.

"I know you do, luv, you like challenges, this is more like boring paperwork, you are made for action, and you get stuck with mewling sissies." He turned back to me and pulled a flask from his coat and tossed it to me I caught it with practised ease I took the cap off and the scent of demon blood reached my nose and invaded my senses, immediately I drowned the substance hungrily, welcoming the power rush that came with it . "I brought you something"

"You brought me something?" I repeated.

"Is there an eco in here? Yes I brought you something!" when I said our relationship was better I meant that now I ignored the snarky comments of Crowley who kept being the ultimate bitch. The demon-king snapped his fingers and a huge hell-hound appeared by his side, he monstrous beast was at least six foot tall it had nasty razor sharp teeth.

"What´s that thing for?" I asked disgusted, I´ve never been a dog person and the thing was hideous.

"This is your new pet, soon you´ll start to feel restless of being locked up in here, and knowing you you´ll try sneaking out." I grinned at that; I had started planning on going for a stroll last week. "You are demonic enough that the most of the demons out there won´t even spare a glance at you, but some of them can be a bit nasty, therefore 'this' is for… insurance." He motioned the beast.

"How do I know it won´t eat me?" I challenged. The demon rolled his eyes.

"I said it was for protection, did I not? Besides." He walked to the knives´ table and picked the smallest one, then he came near me and yanked my left arm up, I gave a tiny yelp in surprise as he started craving an odd looking rune in my wrist, when he finished he went to the hell-hound and craved the same rune in the monster´s forehead, the animal didn´t even flinch, when he finished both marks glowed red and disappeared. "There, he´ll only obey you."

"He understands English?" I asked skeptically.

"He´ll understand any language you speak to him." Crowley answered almost annoyed.

"Fluffy´s got a name?"

"Here find him one." he snapped his fingers again and a heavy old looking book with golden letters appeared in his hands. "And find yourself one too, you can´t go out there saying you are Dean Winchester" he left the book in the table. "See you tomorrow luv, Ta-ta" with that he vanished leaving me with the hell-hound, which hadn´t moved since it was brought to the room. I noticed the beast was looking at me expectantly.

"What?" I asked him as began to feel uncomfortable under its gaze. "go lay there." I pointed to a corner in the room, I was a bit surprised when the hell dog obeyed, moving to the place I had signalled and laying there, once settled it looked back at me again. I sighed. "Stop looking at me!" the animal gave me a bored look and turned to rest it´s enormous head on its front paws.

I shook my head and turned to the book Crowley had left for me. The golden letters read 'Anglo-Saxon / English Encyclopaedia.' Who the hell had one of this? Well, evidently Crowley did. Sammy would love to get his hands on it for sure. I opened the book and took a fast look through its pages, I was interrupted by a whimper behind me, I turned to the woman strapped to the rack.

"Oh, I had forgot you where there, my apologies, you see I don´t usually get presents, so this was a special occasion." I closed the book and placed it in another table far away so it wouldn´t get ruined by the blood that was about to be shed.

AZRAFIEL

I don´t know how long had it been since the grace torture started, I could only guess it had been at least two months of being stabbed all around and having my body burn up again and again, each time I would stay awake longer, it would burn less and less, now it only left a residual ache, maybe I was just getting used to it.

Most of the time I spent in a state of numbness when I wasn´t asleep nor awake, but I could hear things, voices; a female´s voice that I recognized of the angel I met when I arrived to heaven, the other one was Camael´s.

"…he is starting to assimilate it, he no longer feels the pain." Camael said disgusted, they were not far from where I laid immobilized.

"Then give him the ones on the bottles!" the she-angel answered clearly annoyed at the other angel.

"Are you sure? That is a lot of power." Camael countered.

"Will it cause him pain?" there was no answer from my tormentor. "Then do it." That only meant the answer was positive and the shot respite I had been given was about to end. I heard the angel moving around me, I heard as he uncorked something.

"Wake up." He commanded me as he slapped me across the face, I opened my eyes sloppily. "I want to see the pain in your eyes." He turned to the flask he had opened and filled the syringe with its contents.

"You know, that´s what demons usually said to me, down in the pit." I managed to say somewhat clearly, this as expected earned me a punch in the eye.

"Do not compare me to those deformities." He growled as he plunged the needle all the way to my heart, I hadn´t screamed since I had arrived to this hell in heaven place, but I couldn´t stop myself from letting out the most deafening scream, not even in hell I screamed like this, not once, but as he emptied the grace into my heart, all I knew was agony, this time darkness was not kind enough to claim me, it burned my insides for hours; every single cell in my body was on fire, and on it went for longer than I cared to count.

Time was lost to me I didn´t know if it had been an hour, a week or a century, after that first time I was injected with similar grace two other times, when the effects of the last shot started to banish I was sure I had more grace that blood in my body.

When the she-angel came again I was completely conscious, Camael was sitting on a stool watching over me, next to him were four tiny full-of-grace bottles, they were branded but from where I was I couldn´t read the silver labels.

"There are only four left" announced the sitting angel.

"Will they be of some use?" the female asked.

"You know they will, more so if I use them in the right order, but will you risk it?" Camael challenged.

HUNTER

Benny had decided to call me Hunter, as all the creatures that we encounter here did. I had lost count of the time spent in this eternal gray twilight, this huge forest that looked identical in all directions. We were supposed to be walking in the direction of a stream, Cas was supposed to be there. I had extracted that bit of information from another vampire, one I had to torture before it would speak.

I had noticed I became ruthless more primal, all my instincts were constantly on high alert, expecting to be attacked at any moment, by whatever creature that wanted my head or my meat. I got used to feel nothing but the need to find my angel friend and get back to my brother.

We walked 500 miles and 500 more, just to find the stream and no Cas at all, once we reached the stream we followed it in the direction the water flowed, if you drank the water you would only feel more thirst than if you avoided the stuff, since I arrived to this 'almost hell' several months? ago I have never had the needed to eat, drink or sleep, I don't lose weight or energy, if anything I get stronger every day.

"Dean?" I heard a weak voice coming from behind a bush.

"Cas?" I called back.

"Yes." The low voice of my friend replied, he sounded as if he was in pain. I moved to search for him, I saw the edge of his hideous trench coat drenched in blood, I quickly stepped behind the bush Cas was hiding behind.

"What happened to you? Man, you look bad." Cas lay on the dirty ground, he had several nasty gashes on his left arm and where his shirt was ripped I could see a big claw wound.

"I would expect so, survival has not been…" Cas stopped and looked at something behind me, expecting an attack I reached for my weapon, I could hardly call knife a piece of rock tied to a femur, looking over my shoulder I found it only to be Benny, and relaxed a bit.

"Hunter we got to get moving." Castiel´s eyes went wide and he was looking between me and the vampire, then he opened his mouth but closed it again, he made that confusion face of his, tilt of head, frowny eyes and all.

"Cas this is Benny, yes he is a vampire, and no he is not gonna drink me, he is gonna help us get out of here." I recited not giving the angel the opportunity to ask unnecessary questions. When the angel looked like he was not going to protest any more I moved closer to help him stand.

**Please R&R give me your opinion on this fic, any misspelling issues or error you find please do tell me.**


	3. Chapter 3

HINSITHGRYRE

The once cold relationship between Dev and I, was now as close as one could be between human and pet, the hellhound was every single minute of every single day by my side, we soon learned to be friends, and the truth is that when there was no one around the beast was just like a massive puppy.

When I first started to walk through Hell with Dev, I rapidly found out that to earn my place in the pit, and in the world once I was back there, I had to be respected, which down here translated as feared. So if I had to be feared, _fear_ I would become. Not long after it was heard in Hell that I was nothing compared to Alastair, they´d say that one never knew the true meaning of pain until they passed through my rack, no one dared cross me, no one looked me in the eye, everyone moved out of my way or suffered the consequences. That´s how I acquired my new name, my demon name: Hinsithgryre which translates to fear in anglo-saxon.

A hundred years I had been down here, almost a year upstairs. I had become a full high-ranking demon almost half a century ago, I had changed much ever since. My eyes were almost completely black except for the vibrant green irises, which looked like floating circles over an endless darkness, I had small red scales here and there adorning my skin, the top of my head was crowned by graceful 6 inch long horns right over my temples they were curved backwards and then upwards giving them an _s_ like shape, massive dark-scarlet leathery wings had grown from my back, and by massive I mean _humongous_, the things were 8 foot long each. My general features were basically unchanged, I had not gained height, my face was the same, my hair was the same, but now I looked dangerous, even without the horns and 16 foot wingspan additions, even I admit I looked downright scary.

Right now I was actually quite bored, I had taken my place as Crowley´s right-hand demon almost 30...35… years ago, give or take, so now I was standing next to the King who was comfortably resting on his throne listening reports of little stupid demons and their doings upstairs, and honestly I couldn´t give a …

"…the Winchester has not tried to contact any of us, he was living with a human girl and a dog on a motel, but they just bought a house." One of the uglies before us said taking me out of my thoughts.

"Is the woman a hunter?" I spoke for the first time since the audience started.

"No, Lord Hinsithgryre" the demon bowed his head at me, Crowley had given me the status of Lord, with power over everyone but the king himself. "The human girl is a veterinarian." Sammy sleeping/living with a vet?

"Has he tried to find Kevin?" the demon shook his head and answered with a court 'no my lord'. Was Sam not trying to get me back?! Had he given up on me? My now dark and consumed heart was filled with loneliness.

AZRAFIEL

Time in Heaven is not constant, some days go in the blink of an eye, and others seem like centuries, but not in a bored-to-entertained human way, no, in a way more literal manner.

After being injected, or more likely stabbed, by Camael with the last of the grace of the last of the bottles Naomi had brought, I was thrown in a holding cell, a dark place compared to where I was kept during my torture sessions.

My body ached all over, the simple act of breathing proved to be painful, so I stayed as immobile as manageable resting over my left side, the worst part, was my back; I felt as if something was crawling under my skin, pushing out, shouting for freedom, my pulse was constantly erratic, as was my temperature; causing me to shiver bordering on hypothermia a minute and sweating the next as I burned with fever. I could feel the angel juice running through my veins, replacing my blood with raw celestial grace.

The throbbing in my back intensified, making it more painful every passing hour, until it suddenly spiked, I heard a nasty ripping sound that was accompanied by a scream of pure misery, it took me a while to realize the ripping sound came from my back, and the scream from my throat. Whatever was crawling under my skin before had found its freedom. I was barely conscious when I understood what was happening; white bone was what had forced itself out of my back in six different spots paired symmetrically, three under each shoulder blade. Bones formed, stretched and curved filling my whole being of murderous agony, after that, bone got covered by skin, and skin by feathers.

When it all mercifully stopped I could feel my temperature go back to normality, as did my heart rate. A very welcomed warmth ran over my body, and I felt how it started to heal all the damage ever done to my body and soul, as the warmth reseeded I let my consciousness slip away.

I slowly came back from my peaceful slumber, my body felt well rested, and better than when I resurrected. It took me a while to remember what happened before I slipped out, as it came back to me I had a small freak out moment before I managed to sit and untangle myself of the bunch of raven black feathers that were covering me as a soft blanket. Several minutes passed before I could separate and feel the six things apart, having extra appendages was not easy, much less six of them, I discovered it was easier to move them as pairs. Working on controlling them a while longer, once I got some semblance of control I stretched them all I could inside my little cell, and I couldn´t spread them completely, each pair was at least 12 feet from tip to tip, all of the most stunning black I´ve ever seen, the feathers reflected the light as if they were made from pure silk.

"Those are beautiful wings you´ve grown." It was Naomi. When she mentioned the wings, I noticed I was able to see hers; they adjusted perfectly to her frame, two perfect white wings. "Hello Azrafiel." I looked around for this Azrafiel, I supposed it was another angel standing behind me, but there was no one.

"Who are you talking to lady?" I asked.

"I am talking to you, Azrafiel." She said as she looked at me straight in the eye.

"My name is Dean Winchester, you bitch." I retorted as I got myself back on my feet.

"No, that was your name when you were human, Azrafiel is your new name, your angel name, you should learn it, Dean Winchester don´t exist when we are done with you." her tone was even, yet insistent and demanding.

"Humans can´t become angels." I was denying everything that had happened to me since the death of the leviathan, the burning grace in my veins and all three pairs of wings attached to my back.

"And who told you that? If angels can become human, why is it not possible to happen the other way around?" the angel gave a sweet smile that made me sick. "Your training starts in a few hours, Camael will collect you."

HUNTER

Cas´s wounds where more extent than I initially thought, Benny helped me clean and cover all of them, we were able to immobilize his broken ankle without unfriendly interruptions. it turned out that even when I didn´t have any human necessities; Cas did, he got hungry at least twice a day, he needed to sleep and rest constantly slowing us down.

Benny had explained to me that purgatory was never made to hold humans, so when God created it he had left a door, using a spell I would hide Benny´s soul within my arm and highjack him back to the world of the living.

Cas´s wounds were healing slowly, I had to clean them daily, I tried to do it while he was sleeping to save time, but sometimes I´d just manage to wake him up. Benny tried to convince me more than once to leave the angel behind because Castiel´s sent attracted the leviathans, which was true, but I couldn´t leave my friend behind, even after all he´s done, I couldn´t leave him alone.

It took us another month at least to reach the base of the cliff over which the portal was stationed at the present moment. Benny and I did the ritual there and I helped Cas to climb the mountain.

We were halfway there when the angel asked if we could stop for a while, I assisted him to a large rock, and then I looked around to make sure the perimeter was somewhat safe.

"Dean" I heard Jimmy´s deep voice.

"What´s up Cas?" I said not turning to face the one I once called brother.

"I-I wanted to say something to you."

"I hear you."

"Um, thank you." Now _that_ made me turn and stare in confusion into those pathetically beautiful blue eyes. "Thank you for helping me, I don´t deserve it. And I don´t deserve your forgiveness."

"Cas, don´t." Gee the Angel of the Lord was worse than Sam at chick flick moments! "Man, you are basically family, besides you forgave _me_ after _I_ started the firkin Apocalypse, I´d be a fucking hypocrite holding a grudge at you." Cas looked away not saying another word until he was rested enough to climb some more.

We reached the gate back home, which actually looked kind of like a floating crack that emitted this bright white light. We were no more than a few yards away when the leviathans attacked, we tried to fight them, but there were too many so we went for the portal.

"Come on Cas! Just a little more!" I couldn´t reach for his hand before the portal sucked me in.

* * *

**New chappie! don´t expect the new ones to come out this fast, but I´ll try. Next chapter Dean will be whole again and I´m still working on how that´s going to work.**


	4. Chapter 4

HUNTER

When I woke up I was alone in the middle of a forest, at night. I had nothing, I was as dirty as possible and I still had to get to Benny´s grave. How I managed I don't know.

As soon as Benny´s soul left my forearm, I felt at peace; I had fulfilled my promise. Benny and I said our goodbyes and parted in different directions.

I was walking through a wheat field when I fell to my knees; all strength had left my body, I was unable to stand. Unexpectedly black smoke that carried the smell of Hell rose from the ground beneath me and it circled around me, it was joined by a bright white fluid silk-looking light that came from the sky, they spun over me in opposite directions never touching, they felt… familiar.

They seemed to complement one another, but something was off, it was as if a piece of the puzzle was missing, a third part. That´s when I felt my soul leave my body it was a strange feeling. Was this like when Sam was soulless? Was this what he felt? Empty? Incomplete?

Not only could I feel my soul leave, but I could see it, it´s shape was not unlike the smoke or the bright light, my soul was grey, it shone brighter in some parts and it had dark spots all over it. My soul joined the other two, it was the missing piece. Black smoke, bright light and the greyish mass of my soul moved together forming a ring, they were as close as they could without touching, never mixing. They froze suddenly, and just as abruptly the three of them rushed into me I was unable to move.

COLLECTIVE MIND

Everything around Hunter became a blur before clearing out, the thing was that wherever he was now, it was not in some field by Benny´s grave.

There were two figures before him one was clearly an angel, a quite worn out looking angel, wings and all. Hunter had never before seen angel wings, they were enthralling. The other one was a demon, but not a black eyed one, it looked more like a demon that came out of one of those old books on Bobby´s shelves, with bat-like leathery wings and wicked horns.

"Who are you?" the human asked the others.

"I am Lord Hinsithgryre, right hand man to the King of Hell." the demon was the first to talk, sounding as regal as he claimed to be.

"I-I…, m-my n-name is D-D-Azrafiel" the angel seemed completely spooked; he had used his wings to cover himself like he was expecting to be punished for saying the wrong thing.

"And you are?" Hunter jumped a little as he was brought out of his thoughts by the voice of the demon lord.

"Name´s Dean Winchester. Though, I´ve been known as Hunter for a while." He simply answered not expecting the reactions of the opposite beings who watched him eyes blown wide.

"That´s impossible." They said at the same time.

"What?"

"That_ is_ impossible." The demon repeated. "It is impossible because _I_ used to be Dean Winchester."

"The fuck are you talking about?! You cannot be me! I would never…" the angel recoiled at the loud outburst.

"There is no need to yell, you are scaring him." The demon moved closer to the holy creature with its hands up. "It is fine, none of us will hurt you." The angel just lowered its head. The demon turned back at me. "Besides, you would never, what? Become a demon? Don´t fool yourself Hunter! The first time down there we were quite close if you remember. If you are Dean as much as I am, you know I wouldn´t have become a demon if I had another viable choice."

"I… I was D-D… I was him too." Azrafiel somehow accomplished to sound like a small hurt child. Demon and human broke visual contact to look at him with perplexity.

"Humans can´t become angels." Hunter stated as a matter of fact.

"If angels can become human, why is it not possible to happen the other way around?" the angel recited the much heard phrase.

"But neither of you look anything like me!" Hunter gasped as realization dawned on him, this beings were actually _him_, Parts of him? They were all once upon a time Dean Winchester, but now they were three separate identities

"Well, he has become an angel and I a demon, you are the only one who looks somewhat like we used to."

"Since…"

"Dick" we all said.

"H-How long h-has it been?" the angel asked showing his face between the shadows casted by his feathers.

"It´s been a year on Earth, or so I was told." The human replied.

"On Earth?" the demon repeated. "Were you not on Earth?"

"Nope, I ended up purgatory with Cas."

"Where is he? Where is Castiel?" the angel spoke up coming out of its wings, standing exposed for the first time.

"I..." He was interrupted by the memory of those last moments playing before their eyes like a huge screen.

"I see." The demon said once the memory ran out. "We must go find Sam, and we need to see Bobby about… this" he gestured between the three of them.

"Right." Just as the word left Hunter´s mouth everything became a blur again.

Things came back into focus after a little while. The human noticed he felt complete once again and this time he was able to stand easily. But he was not in control of his body´s actions.

_"What the..?"_

"Do you want to walk all the way to the cabin?" the sound came out of his mouth but the words belonged to another.

"Well I _am_ you." The demon was in possession of his body! "I am not possessing anyone, this body is as mine and Azrafiel´s as it is yours, besides only one of us can be in control at a time."

Hinsithgryre had them appear just outside Bobby´s old cabin, the impala was nowhere to be seen. The demon passed the control of their body back to Hunter.

"_Go on, are you going to stand here all day?"_

"I´m going, dammit!" He walked to the door and hesitated for a second before walking inside, the cabin was deserted but not untaken care of. "So… Sam must come around now and then. We´ll just have to wait for him to come back."

The fridge was empty, but inside of a cabinet he found a bottle of whiskey, a half empty bottle of whiskey.

_"Should we be drinking?" _That was the first time the angel spoke in their CM*. _"What if Sammy arrives?"_

*Collective Mind

"It wouldn´t be the first time he would see me, us, whatever, drinking. I deserve a sip after a year sober."

_"Do not worry Azrafiel, I do not think we can get drunk any more, at least not with one half bottle of paltry whiskey." _The demon contributed.

Hunter took the bottle to their lips and drowned a swig of the liqueur, the taste was somewhat off and the amber fluid burned and stung the back of their throat making him uncomfortable.

"The fuck?!" He said, a thin vapour came out of their mouth.

_"Oh, sorry that´s probably me."_

"Hinsithgryre, what the hell!?

_"Well it is obvious it was doused with holy water, and while it can´t really hurt me, or us for that matter, it still can be quite unpleasant. That thing was terrible anyway, I would never call 'whiskey' something as awful as that." _

"Uhg!" Hunter threw the bottle against the wall to liberate his frustration, almost immediately he regretted it as he felt Azrafiel coward deep into the back of his mind, their mind?

_"Great! Way to go Hunter! Go all violent around the only of us with PTSD! I´ll go see if I can make him come back, one thing we most certainly do not need, is having a part of us not working properly. Now you stay here and stop braking stuff." _The demon reprimanded, a demon was lecturing him and he was letting him, it probably had to do with them being the same person.

That was it! They were three parts of a whole, somehow when Dick exploded it divided Dean, creating them!

It was a long time before Hunter felt the other beings coming back to the more conscious part of their CM.

"Az, man. Azrafiel, I´m sorry, I didn´t mean to, you know." Hunter tried to apologize.

_"It´s okay Hunter, I shouldn´t have reacted like that either." _

None spoke after that. Lucky them in the later afternoon they heard the unmistakable motor of the impala approaching.

"God, I missed that sound!" Hunter said out loud.

_"We all did." Az commented._

They heard the car´s door open and close, then soft sound of footsteps over the bland humid terrain that became loud echoes as they moved to the porch, the door opened slowly and all of Hunter´s instincts were telling him to attack the intruder, but Hinsithgryre and Azrafiel held him back making him stay rational.

Hunter stood there like an idiot as they saw Sam coming into the hut and closing the door behind him before turning to where he was standing. Sam stopped abruptly staring at his long lost brother.

"Dean?"


	5. Chapter 5

Hunter was trying to remember where had he left all the stuff to test that the Sam before him was human: the holy water, the borax, the silver knife. He got cut out by Azrafiel taking control.

"_What are you doing?! He could be anything!" _Sam saw his brother flinch slightly, but in his shock he said nothing.

"_Relax Hunter, just because you can´t see his soul, it doesn´t mean we can´t." _Az said walking up to his Sammy.

"_It´s _our_ Sammy angel." _Hinsithgryre corrected.

"_Right, I apologize." _Dean smiled hugging his brother tightly. Az released control back to Hunter when the hug broke.

"Dude…" Sam looked astonished. "You´re…Freakin´alive. I mean, what the hell happened?"

"_Do I tell him?" Hunter was insecure about how to proceed._

"_We can´t lie to him." Az interjected._

"_Azrafiel is right we need Sam´s trust, we need him to be able to trust the three of us or who knows what will come to pass." _

"_We must wait for the right moment."_

Dean sighed. "Well, I guess that standing to close to an exploding Dick send your ass to Purgatory."

"You were in purgatory?" Sam asked. Dean nodded. "For the whole year?"

"Yeah, time flies when you´re running for your life."

"Well, How did you get out?"

"I guess whoever built that box didn´t want me in there any more than I did.

"What does that mean?"

"I´m here, okay?"

"What about Cas? Was he there?" Sam´s face fell when Dean looked away from him.

"Yeah, Cas didn´t make it."

"_It is not that I want to cut this chick flick short, but we should get to Bobby´s ASAP, remember?" The demon distracted Hunter slightly by broadcasting the thought in their CM._

"Sam, d´you mind if you question me on the way to Bobby´s?" Sam looked really uncomfortable with the idea of driving to Sioux Falls.

"Yeah, sure. He´s really missed you." Sam didn´t lose his opportunity to ask questions , he began once Dean had put the Impala on the road.

"What exactly did you mean, when you said Cas didn´t make it?" Sam knew his brother wouldn´t want to talk about that, but he needed to know.

"Something happened to him down there. Things got pretty hairy towards the end, and he… just let go."

"So Cas is dead? You saw him die?"

"I saw enough."

"So, then what, you´re not sure?"

"I said I saw enough, Sam." The look Sam received from his brother was enough to drop it.

"Right. Dean, I´m sorry."

"Me too."

"So you—you know that half your numbers are out of service?" Dean was hurt and now he was changing the topic. A bit less than an hour separated them from the salvage yard owned by Bobby. Sam wondered if he could avoid his brother long enough to get to the other hunter. "Felt like I was leaving messages in the wind."

"Yeah, I-I-I didn´t get your messages." Sam looked down at his fidgeting hands.

"How come?"

"Probably because I ditched the phones."

"Because…?"

"I guess, um… I guess something happened to me this year too, I don't hunt anymore."

"_He´s gotta be kiddin´ me."_

"_Keep calm Hunter, you are not the only one upset with our little brother." Hinsithgryre spoke unpleased. Az had retreated at the building anger, but his agreement with the thought could be felt._

"Yeah, and Sasha Grey´s gone legit." Sam scoffed.

"What?"

"Nothing. Um, she did a Soderbergh movie."

"What?"

"She did a Soderbergh…"

"No. _You_ Sam. You quit?" Dean shook his head eyes on the road. "You know what? Don't tell me, I don´t want to know."

The rest of the way to Bobby´s salvage yard was made in silence, not even the music was turned off to dissipate the tension between the Winchester brothers.

Bobby was reading a big old book on Japanese lore when he heard the familiar noise of John´s old Impala, his brows furrowed; he had not seen Sam since they fought over Dean´s death almost a year ago. Sam was being an ass at the time and Bobby could just take that much of his attitude.

He walked to the door and opened it just as the idjit was about to knock.

"Uh. Bobby, hi. Uh- can we come in?" Bobby heard one of the Impala´s doors being shut. Moving to see behind Sam, his eyes went wide when he saw Dean walking up to the porch, an odd sense of false déjà-vu filled his shocked mind.

Bobby let them in and walked to the dining room-made-studio, dean walked easily through the Devil´s trap on the entrance.

"What? No hello? No 'good to have you back'?" Dean teased as he was enveloped in a tight hug by his father figure.

"How d´you get back?" Bobby released him walking to the fridge to grab a pair of beers surly doused with holy water, the old man passed one to Dean opening another for himself. Sam just stood weirdly leaning on a wall, Bobby hadn´t directed a single word to Dean´s baby brother.

"I, it´s complicated." Dean took a sip of his beer preparing for the unpleasant sensation of burn given by the holly water, he turned and walked towards Bobby´s desk so the humans wouldn´t see the slight vapor coming out his mouth and nostrils, not noticing when he stepped under the Salomon´s key drawn on the ceiling, a simple devil´s trap was not enough o retain him but the whole key could, he could easily break it but he would be giving out himself too early.

"_Incredibly smart of you cover one track and then point them to the bear´s lair!" Hinsithgryre retorted sarcastically._

"_Hush you!"_

"Something happened when Dick exploded, I-well I mean…" Hunter sighed.

"Out with it boy." Bobby pressed.

"_Damn! Here it goes." Hunter sighed again in their CM, and dean shifted on his feet looking at the floor._

"When Dick exploded I, no, Dean got divided." Hunter looked up at his family, Bobby took a shot gun loaded with rock salt he had left near the kitchen table narrowing his eyes when he saw Dean was standing in the edge of the trap on the roof. Sam moved closer to Bobby taking out Ruby´s old knife. "Three pieces one, landed in Heaven, other in Hell, and I ended up in Purgatory. We came back together when I broke out from monster house."

"Dean, what? You´re not making any sense." Sam shook his head, genuinely confused.

"You better start explainin´ son." Dean raised his hands when Bobby pointed the double barrels at him.

"Okay, okay. I went to purgatory with Cas, but there is other two mes in here." Dean pointed to his head. "Our soul or somethin´ ended a piece in Heaven and the other back in Hell." The humans looked at each other and then back at Dean like if he had lost a screw, or more like several.

"_Guys, a little help here?"_

"_Oh for Death itself! Move!" the demon lord was pised by the inability of Hunter to communicate._

"Hello Bobby, Sammy." The humans observed as Dean´s posture became more confident and regal. "Please, let us explain before you shoot. As Hunter said, that´s our human self, we somehow split I am the part of Dean that ended back in the pit." Hinsithgryre let his true eyes be seen for a second; confirming Bobby´s suspicions of him not being exactly human. "We´ve been talking between us but none of us knows what happened to the other 'Deans' during the last year. The part of us that went to Hea… uuff" the demon stopped talking when the rock salt impacted on their chest. "Azrafiel, your turn." Sam and Bobby watched Dean´s second change on demeanor.

"Robert please calm down, you as well Samuel. I know you are scared and confused, but you need to calm down." Dean´s aura was calm and peaceful, and it actually helped them to relax little by little. "Good, now you must listen to what we need to say, we need you to trust us, because right now we do no not trust one another." Azrafiel waited for any sign of understanding, the younger Winchester nodded slightly and Bobby reluctantly the angel continued. "I am Azrafiel, I am an angel of the Lord, but I used to be your brother. I _am_ your brother, but so are Hunter and the demon you just spoke to. During the last year each of us thought we were the only D-De… we thought we were only one person, but when Hunter came back from Purgatory, I was pulled out of Heaven, and Hinsithgryre out of Hell. We recombined on our old body, we do not know how but now the three of us share a body but not our memories after the explosion."

"So Dean´s gone." The eldest hunter lowered the gun in his hands looking defeated by a short-lived hope.

"No. You misunderstand, the three of us together are D… are him, we are Sam´s brother. And your son." The angel tried to make them understand, lowering his gaze at the last sentence. Azrafiel was expecting a rejection from the human at the bold statement, but when it didn´t come he receded back with a small smile to let Hunter through again.

"It´s like we have multiple personalities. Like I´m tri-polar." Hunter continued where Az left off.

"_Puff, that was tough." Hunter let out relieved._

"_That´s an understatement." Hinsithgryre growled._

"_You´re just annoyed you got shot." The demon just huffed and the angel´s lip corner raised a bit._

"Dean, I-I. I mean, I don´t… I don't get what´s going on." Sam stuttered.

"I don´t trust you. I _can´t_ trust you" Bobby cut in.

"I don´t trust me either."


End file.
